Truth is probably THE HARDEST thing to tap into. Shees – But we are a judgmental people who hide our truths and imperfections from the world. If only we knew that it is in the admittance and acceptance of our weaknesses and vulnerabilities that we draw closer to one another. We are all well acquainted with the “Light” that is within us – we cowardly hide behind it. All of this because we are all yearning to belong somewhere, someplace. Here is the thing, people only judge what they either don’t understand at all OR what they understand all too well… “Every opinion is a vision loaded with personal history” (not excluding self) and thus most judgements received stems from somewhere. If you are going to stand in your truth, be ready to be judged, be ready to be questioned and possibly be labeled by those who just don’t understand.
With a world that has been engulfed in a sick desire to accumulate more. Our gluttonous nature born to fill the abyss within our lives … A bottomless pit filled with all the things this world is offering us on a silver platter, while in a different corner of the world people all genuinely struggling or suffering. Facetiously going about our day – For what isn’t being acknowledged somehow doesn’t exist, right? Wrong. Truth – what is your truth? What is it that you stand for …? And I am not only talking about global matters here…. When you connect with someone in casual conversation are you GENUINELY concerned with how they are doing? Or are you so consumed with the idea of “self” that you can’t see the struggle or suffering of the person right next to you?
Here is what I have learned about truth…
Truth doesn’t show up behind closed doors, or behind a curtain that is conveniently placed there for easy access. Truth happens as a result of being buried for too long. Truth requires courage. It asks us to first and foremost be truthful regarding ‘self’. Where is it that I am lacking? How can I show up more authentically? Truth will rip you apart and leave you vulnerable and exposed for the entire world to see. And truth will gently place you in a position to be judged by those who do not understand or who do not care to understand or who choose to rather look the other way. Truth casts light into the darkness and it will require every single ounce of willpower and courage for you to stay in truth. Because truth is not easy. It will be the hardest thing you have ever had to step into, yet also the most liberating thing you can do for yourself. It requires honest reflection. Accountability in knowing that in some way we are all suffering, and we have all at some point in the past or will in future be partly responsible for another’s suffering.
Truth is not easy my friend – it requires you to carefully inspect not only aspects of self but to heal any parts of self that led you to believe so firmly in the truth.
Truth is bold, truth is courageous, truth is HARD AF because it holds you accountable. Truth is also a gateway to many wonderful things such as acknowledgement of the part you play which ultimately and inevitably will lead to compassion and understanding. Not only of self, but also for others.
Truth is a bitter, hard pill to swallow. Especially when confronting the Shadow self. Have you met your shadow? How well do you know the dark side that is you? For we are all, every one of us – both dark and light. The one cannot function without the other.
SHARING A REFLECTION WRITTEN A FEW YEARS BACK REGARDING DISSOCIATION/DEPRESSION/HURT/GRIEF/ANGER - HEALING IS A JOURNEY & A PROCESS AND I HAVE LEARNED TO BOTH FEEL AND MAKE SPACE FOR EVERY SINGLE FEELING I FEEL. IT IS HARD BUT NECESSARY - OUR EMOTIONS SERVE A PURPOSE. HOW ATTUNED ARE YOU TO WHAT YOU ARE FEELING ?
It grows on you.
Attaches itself to you, oh so gently. Enters into your being very, very silently.
You - Oblivious to its existence. It breaths, feeds. Sucks you dry.
When dit this internal shift start ? (You wonder). Hi. Please to meet you ... Do I now you? The mirror echoes ... Perplexed, you stare at the ghostly image mocking your every move.
The light that once danced in those eyes are gone. The corners of that mouth no longer lifts to flirt with the eyes. Time seems to stand still as the world dances along to a beat you no longer hear.
Moments - long gone start piercing through. Hacking its way through.
The wound starts oozing - leaving you shaky and weak.
Stop - Please stop. You swallow hard on the sick pushing its way up.
Oh God - Why does this hurt so much ? I don't want to feel anymore.
Sweet release as Feeling bids her farewell. Silently making her exit.
You - left with a big gaping whole where Feeling resided. 'Numb' casually unpacks his suitcase.
'Sadness'. 'Hopelessness'. 'Despair' - They are all now proudly displayed on your inner self ...
'Numb' nestles himself cozily into your heart space. Mine, he triumphantly whispers from within.
What do you want from me? You softly ask ...
Nothing - 'Numb' replies.